Clay Pipe Fragment. 

I realise I haven’t written here for a while.  The truth is it has been a difficult year – one of relocation, disorientation and upheaval – the loss of all that was familiar and ‘normal’ which, if I’m honest, has given rise to feelings of anxiety, depression and isolation.  Along with it has come, almost inevitably, the dreaded ‘creative block’ – and the frustration which always accompany it – serving to exacerbate the negativity that has been swirling around me for months.

But things have shifted recently and subtle changes are afoot.   Builders, electricians, roofers, plumbers, heating engineers and decorators vans are no longer parked daily on our drive. The weather is improving and we are getting out into the world again, away from this house which has dominated our thoughts for months.  But perhaps, more importantly, the world is coming to us in the form of friends and visitors who have, for the most part, been unusually absent since we relocated – due, of course, to Covid restrictions but mostly because of the disruption to our normal lives while the house has been a ‘work in progress’.

I also count myself very fortunate to have been the recipient of three ‘gifts’ which all arrived last week.  The first in the form of an encouraging, validatory message from an artist whose work I greatly admire and collect. The second and third in the comforting shape of a valued friend and fellow creative who came for an overnight stay.

She brought with her the fragment pictured above but, more importantly, the gift of her time and attention.  She is calm, sensible and grounded but above all a good listener.  As a consequence I felt able to open up and talk through what was on my mind – without interruption, judgment, criticism, distraction, toxic positivity or unsolicited offers of potential ‘solutions’.  The whole process was hugely cathartic and a great privilege.  I was, and remain, extremely grateful for that opportunity.

And then there is the pipe fragment – ‘Ceci n’est pas une pipe’ (to borrow from Magritte) – which turned out to be not simply a pipe fragment, but an inspirational object, something offering up new possibilities which I’d felt for sometime had been beyond my reach.  A delicate, gently supportive hand proffering something to be filled which, a while ago, I would have seen as a ‘void’ but now armed with more positivity would be increasingly likely to describe as a ‘place’ – a starting point with potential – which I look forward to exploring – filling and fulfilling, literally and metaphorically – in the days, weeks and months that lie ahead.

So, all being well, you may see more from me here again soon.